I know the whole line of what AAs to get first is a personal issue based on how you play. I was kinda curious though what sorta AA route people have gone with on their beastlords when they had a dedicated healer that they box - in my case it is a 64 Druid who I box 90%+ of the time. When he is on the shelf it is usually because of a LDoN type of thing where there is already a healer. They are all worthy to get in the end. I guess I am wondering things like if you went defensive in an effort to take on larger targets at what point was that really realized? Things like that. Anyways, that is why I ask the question here instead of in the AA section.
I use a healer to allow me to fight in tougher spots - BoT earth wing, Tower of Sol Ro, OoW zones, etc, rather than make any other adjustments.
I am very concerned about increasing dps, because that is the main problem as a duo, but I feel that the gains from defensive allow me to tank tougher mobs and get more exp per kill/time. My cleric has greater dps than me in undead areas, for general information (Nadox and Chardok B), and he isn't far behind in live areas. This is level 65/66, mixed Elemental/Bazaar.
Rather an odd combo, but my wife and I both play beastlords. When she's not up for playing, I use her to grind AA.
That said, I went full defensive (not counting OoW - CS/CA/ND/PE/LR/ID). I play the tank, she plays DPS. Although we will eventually cross-contaminate on the AA's, it works quite well for now.